Saturday, July 30, 2011

Zoo Turtles

Honestly, zoos scare the crap out of me and make mama weep. Unhealthy associations. But the nearby little Cape May County Zoo does its best to keep their critters healthy and comfy while they live there. They have turtles, too. Look at giant Uncle Irv!

You can visit their website for more info at

Friday, July 29, 2011

Swims with Fishes

This takes me back to the days on Asbury Ave in the koi pond with my buds. Harmony among friends, my very colorful friends. I miss swimming with these guys. That reminds me, I sure hope she gives me some pool time this weekend...

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Feeding Time

You know I'm ready. I'm in my feeding spot giving you the look. These days I've been scarfing down delicious leafy greens that mama is tossing in the tank along with my favorite repto-nuggets and shrimp cocktail. The nasty heatwave broke a little bit today so I got to run free while she watered the half-dead plants. The weather has been rough on us all. But curiously, still no pool days...

Monday, July 25, 2011

My Cousin: The Yellow Spotted Amazon River Turtle

The Yellow-spotted Amazon River Turtle is one of the largest South American river turtles. It can grow up to 18 in long and weigh up to 20 lbs. This species can be recognized by its black or brown oval carapace (upper shell) with distinctive low keels on the second and third scutes. The yellow spots on the side of its head give this species its common name. Females can be up to twice the size of males.

This species is a 'side-necked' turtle, so called because they do not pull their heads directly into their shell, but rather bend the neck sideways to tuck the head under the rim of the shell. (No place to hide!) Found in tributaries and large lakes of South America's Amazon Basin. During flood season, they may venture into flooded forests or floodplain lakes. They feed on fruits, weeds, fish, and small invertebrates. The average life span of the Yellow-Spotted Amazon River Turtle is 60 to 70 years!

Sunday, July 24, 2011

I Like What She Likes

That's right. I have no problem with that. Goes for everything. Music, relaxing, some leafy green foods, chillin', swimming, naps, waxy backrubs, sleeping late, you name it. And when it's 105° degrees outside I will make a break for the shade, but even that's too hot. So, honestly, on days like today, I'm happy to hang indoors where the temperature makes us all happy. Movies with mama. Now there's my comfort zone.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Calm before the Storm

It's Friday and it could be another busy, crowded weekend, but we are struggling through a nasty heat wave which might scare some folks away. Sweltering temps over 100°F just outside that door, with a pleasant chill inside, thanks to the A/C. While she's at work during the day, I plan to take a moment of quiet before the shoobees storm the town this weekend.

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Strawberry Thief

Stop, thief. Well, really it's my friend Stan, and I say go ahead and enjoy the sweet strawberries growing in the planter outside that I haven't been offered. When I am out on the deck I can see them dangling above me, but I can't reach them yet. Temptation from the nectar of the gods.

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

My Cousin: The Diamondback Turtle

Let's take a minute to learn a little about my hard-shelled cousins. In case you want to own a turtle someday, I decided to toss in an occasional incredible species of terrapin and give you the fun facts to know.

Talk about handsome!

The Diamondback terrapin is the only species of turtle in North
America that spends its life in brackish water (salty but less so
than sea water). Although diamondbacks are highly aquatic, in the
wild they often bask on logs during warm weather.

Diamondback turtles have concentric, somewhat diamond-shaped
markings and grooves on the scutes (plates) of their carapace (top
shell), which ranges from medium gray or brown to nearly black.
Skin color ranges from pale to dark gray or black, flecked with
dark spots, blotches or stripes. The hingeless plastron (bottom
shell) is yellow to green or black and may be marked with dark
figures and blotches. The feet are strongly webbed; the hindfeet
are especially large and flat. Diamondbacks hibernate during the
cold winter months buried in the mud.

Diamondbacks live in coastal salt marshes, estuaries, and tidal
creeks along the U.S. Atlantic and Gulf coasts from Cape Cod,
Massachusetts, to western Texas, including the Florida Keys.
Diamondbacks are well adapted for eating hard-shelled prey
including aquatic snails, crabs, and small bivalves (e.g., blue
mussels). They also eat carrion, fish, marine worms, and plant

Monday, July 18, 2011

Summer Fun

Well, hell. Who doesn't love to jet ski on a beautiful summer weekend? I should have learned that Night in Venice weekend is not the time to try new water sports. Little too much rough and tumble. Turtle Rescue had to be called in to get me back to shore safely. How embarrassing.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Restless & Wrapped

Some days I just want out. Of the tank, that is. If I make enough racket she'll grab me and put me on the porch and let me run wild. I only create a ruckus when she's home and mostly in the warm season. During the colder season, when I start to clump heavily in the tank, she uses a special towel to dry me off before letting me, er, run. But first she swaddles tightly me in the towel (like baby jeezus) to see how long it takes for me to wrangle my way out of it. Pure entertainment on her part. Fluffy agony on mine.

Thursday, July 14, 2011

Afternoon Delight

I love the opportunity to delight and entertain guests, so I was thrilled when mama's friends from work came to see me. One of the ladies seemed to fear me, but the other didn't seem to mind when I pee'd near her chair. I got to run and I got rubbed, but I didn't get any of the good grub they were served for dinner. All they got were blurry photos.

Just call me "Flash"

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

Safe Spot: Reading Chair

After the weekend's trauma to mama, we are keeping at a safe distance from the neighborhood "Nabber" and today I got to relax on the secret corner reading chair, (it rocks and spins!) – a favorite spot to read on warm and wet days. I also have a hiding place under the nearby table where I'm completely incognito. Or maybe I'm just neato!

Sunday, July 10, 2011


Today I was nabbed by a neighbor! Relaxing in my pool in the garden, turtle mama sipping coffee and enjoying breakfast on the deck, and our next door neighbor walks right over to my pool and takes me for a walk in unknown territory. No reaction from mama so I assumed it was safe hanging with my new friend. After a few minutes, mama pops over the fence and asks the neighbor to put me back in the pool when he is finished playing with me. Well, he did no such thing. He went back inside and let me free! I had a few minutes to dig into the deep ivy before mama started yelling for neighbor guy and banging on his door. He told her that he put me back in the pool and I must have escaped but she was watching the whole time, so she called him a liar. Oddly enough, he knew exactly where to look for me in the ivy thicket. Turtle mama rescued me and brought me back to home territory but I could tell she was pretty bothered by the whole thing. I wasn't – I got to explore new ground and feel a little excitement in my day.

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Pee Pee Hee Hee

I peed on her today. *>snicker<*
She asked for it by carrying me around with a full bladder. That's right, my bladder gets full. Real full.

Friday, July 8, 2011

In The Soup

Look, I'll give you the stink eye if you get any closer with that damn camera. Can't a guy have a moment of personal space?

Thursday, July 7, 2011

I'm Back

I'm getting a lot of exercise this summer with the open door policy. I think I even dropped a few ounces performing my deck runs and scrambling over the threshhold. But I know when enough is enough. Exhaustion comes easy.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

The Dark Gnome

He's out there lurking under the tall tree in the back. Seems harmless, standing there among the vines with his silly hat and evil grimace, but I was curious enough to get close and see for myself. I got out before the sun went down, but I'll be back. This is turtle territory, after all.

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Bitch Dropped Me

Like riding a bike and talking on the cell phone while smoking a cigarette, you can't try to snap artsy photos of your favorite turtle with your hands full – or somebody will get hurt. Luckily I landed on the grass, but I still played dead for a few seconds until she tickled my stomach and then it was game over. Little too much Corona on a hot holiday afternoon?

Monday, July 4, 2011

Rockets Red Glare

No, this is not a dirty picture. The 4th of July is about pet and turtle torture, not independence. Hell, I have independence when I'm out of my tank and that's good enough for me. But the rockets and traffic and drunken revelers ... all of my dog friends place this holiday in the 'least favorite' category, just for the booms after dark. Viva le independence!

Sunday, July 3, 2011

Turtles on the Tarmac!

Let's thank the pilots and air traffic controllers at JFK Airport for saving hundreds of my lady cousins, who were just trying to cross the road to lay their eggs on the beach. Unfortunately, a runway got in their way. See the story here:

Saturday, July 2, 2011

Born Free!

Holiday weekend and Mama is home and she is freely giving me my freedom, so I'm on the loooooose! I think I might luck out and get to run outside all weekend. Still no pool, wonder what's up with that? There are more cars in town than usual, so I will stay away from the street and just hug the edge of the lawn. Aaaah, summer.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Revving Up

Today I'm quietly revving up for the holiday weekend as I sit here and watch the world go by while this little beach town floods with vacationers. So many bicycles and so much spandex. I have a feeling there will be a few spa days for me this weekend.